00:00 Stephen Colbert THE ONE PERSON IN WASHINGTON TRUMP HAS REALLY GIVEN THE EXECUTIVE SWIRLY TO THIS WEEK IS ATTORNEY GENERAL AND PIXIE WATCHING YOU HAVE SEX FROM BEHIND A CLOVER LEAF, JEFF SESSIONS. 00:16 IS STILL FURIOUS THAT SESSIONS RECUSED HIMSELF FROM THE RUSSIA INVESTIGATION, AND NOW HE DOESN'T HAVE A RIGHT-HAND MAN AT JUSTICE WHO WILL FIRE MULLER FOR HIM. 00:27 AND WE NOW HAVE LEARNED THAT TRUMP HAS BEEN TALKING PRIVATELY ABOUT HOW HE MIGHT REPLACE SESSIONS AND POSSIBLY SIDESTEP CENTERED OVERSIGHT WITH A RECESS APPOINTMENT. 00:37 WOW, JUST REPLACING SESSIONS WHILE EVERYONE IS ON VACATION, THAT IS COLD. 00:41 THAT'S LIKE SAYING, HEY, KIDDO, WELCOME BACK FROM SUMMER CAMP. 00:44 BY THE WAY, THIS IS YOUR NEW SISTER, ALICE. 00:47 SHE'S REPLACING YOUR OLD SISTER, MARTHA, WHO, LET'S FACE IT, WAS A LITTLE MOUTHY. 00:50 ANYWAY, GET WATCHED UP, BUDDY. 00:53 COME ON. 00:53 OR YOU'RE NEXT. 00:57 IT'S THE FIRST BABY GOOSE STEP, SO A LOT OF SENATORS ARE TRYING TO STOP IT, LIKE ILLINOIS SENATOR AND BUG-EYED SQUEEZE TOY, DICK DURBIN, WHO SAID, WE'RE EXPLOYING THE WAYS RIGHT NOW TO KEEP THE SENATE FORMALLY IN SESSION THROUGH THE AUGUST RECESS. 01:14 THEY MIGHT CANCEL RECESS? 01:18 THAT MEANS MITCH MCCONNELL WOULD HAVE TO SET UP HIS SLIP-N-SLIDE ON THE SENATE FLOOR. 01:22 AND, AND, IT'S NOT. 01:29 It looks fun. 01:31 It looks refreshing. 01:33 It's not just the Democrats. 01:34 South Carolina Republican and oldest man in an elementary school picture, Lindsey Graham, is warning the president not to mess with Sessions. 01:44 Lindsey Graham I'm 100% behind Jeff Sessions. 01:46 There will be no confirmation hearing for a new attorney general in 2017. 01:51 If Jeff Sessions is fired, there will be holy hell to pay. 01:56 Soundbite Holy hell. 01:58 Holy hell. 01:59 I do declare. 02:00 Holy hell. 02:01 And if you persist, I will whip you with my fiddlesticks. 02:04 Holy hell. 02:06 Lindsey Graham And Graham went on to warn... Any effort to go after Mueller could be the beginning of the end of the Trump presidency. 02:14 Soundbite Yes. 02:19 And... Mm-hmm. 02:19 Mm-hmm. 02:29 Stephen Colbert THEN AGAIN, IF HE DOESN'T GO AFTER MUELLER, THAT'S ALSO THE BEGINNING END OF THE TRUMP PRESIDENCY. 02:34 SO EITHER WAY, THINGS ARE LOOKING UP. 02:38 AND GRAHAM IS NOT THE ONLY REPUBLICAN STANDING UP TO TRUMP. 02:42 CHAIRMAN OF THE SENATE JUDICIARY COMMITTEE, AN ANCIENT IDOL CAR FROM A POTATO, CHUCK GRASSLEY, RECENTLY TWEETED, EVERYBODY IN D.C. SHOULD BE WARNED THAT THE AGENDA FOR THE JUDICIARY COMMITTEE IS SET FOR REST OF 2017. 02:58 JUDGES FIRST, SUBCABINET SECOND, A.G. NO WAY. 03:02 WOW, I DID NOT KNOW CHUCK GRASSLEY WAS INTO SLAM POETRY. 03:08 MC, tap that grassly. 03:10 AG, no way. 03:11 In the USA, you ought to know this. 03:13 POTUS, no BS. 03:14 I'm the OG of the GOP in the Senat of the United Hates of Ascarica. 03:30 Soundbite Sorry. 03:31 I'm sorry. 03:33 These are expensive, I think. 03:35 I'm not sure I should have done that.