00:00 Stephen Colbert WELCOME ONE AND ALL TO THE LATE SHOW. 00:01 I'M YOUR HOST STEPHEN COLBERT. 00:03 AND I AM SO HAPPY. 00:05 YEAH, YOU KNOW WHAT? 00:06 YOU KNOW WHAT? 00:07 BACK TO YOU. 00:07 I'M SO HAPPY TO BE WITH YOU, YOU NOT CRAZY PEOPLE. 00:14 BECAUSE YOU'VE GOT TO REMEMBER THAT YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, NO MATTER WHAT DONALD TRUMP SAYS. 00:20 AND JUST REMEMBER, WHAT YOU'RE SEEING AND WHAT YOU'RE READING IS NOT WHAT'S HAPPENING. 00:27 OH, GOOD. 00:29 I WAS WORRIED BECAUSE WHAT I'M SEEING AND READING IS THAT THE PRESIDENT IS A RACIST, HORNY, OLD BURGER GOBLIN WHO LITERALLY STEALS CHILDREN FROM POOR PEOPLE. 00:41 AND I'M BEING TOLD HE'S LYING AGAIN. 00:45 THAT MAKES SENSE BECAUSE THAT'S ANOTHER ONE OF THE THINGS I'M SEEING AND READING. 00:50 EVERY DAY, JUST LIKE THAT, DONALD TRUMP GETS A LITTLE MORE BRAZEN. 00:55 FOR INSTANCE, YESTERDAY HE ANNOUNCED HE IS CONSIDERING STRIPPING THE SECURITY CLEARANCES FROM OFFICIALS WHO HAVE CRITICIZED HIM. 01:02 NOW, I DON'T KNOW IF WE'VE ARRIVED AT DICTATORSHIP, BUT WE'VE DEFINITELY MADE IT TO DICK. 01:13 THIS IS... WE GET TO DICTATOR. 01:14 NEXT COMES TATER. 01:17 THEN TATER. 01:18 AS ONE REPUBLICAN CONSULTANT SAID, USING EXECUTIVE AUTHORITY TO PUNISH CRITICS SETS A BAD PRECEDENT. 01:27 YES, TRULY A BAD PRESIDENT. 01:28 I'M SORRY. 01:30 PRECEDENT. 01:31 I'M SORRY. 01:32 BOTH. 01:32 I'M SORRY. 01:34 NOT SORRY. 01:36 NOW, UP UNTIL THIS MOMENT, FORMER SENIOR OFFICIALS TYPICALLY KEPT THEIR INTELLIGENCE CLEARANCES BECAUSE HAVING SUCH STATUS ALLOWS THEM TO BE CONSULTED BY THEIR SUCCESSORS ON ISSUES OF VITAL NATIONAL SECURITY INTEREST WHERE THEIR EXPERIENCE AND INSTITUTIONAL KNOWLEDGE CAN OFFER PRICELESS CONTEXT. 01:56 THIS IS SO IMPORTANT. 01:58 THESE PEOPLE ARE THE INSTITUTIONAL MEMORY OF OUR INTELLIGENCE SERVICES. 02:04 OF ALL OF OUR INTERNATIONAL RELATIONSHIPS. 02:06 BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, THOSE WHO FAIL TO LEARN FROM HISTORY ARE DONALD TRUMP. 02:12 NOW, WHEN ASKED WHETHER THIS TRAMPLES ON FREE SPEECH YESTERDAY, SARAH HUCKABEE SANDERS HUCKED THIS UP. 02:20 Sarah Huckabee Sanders No, I think you are creating your own story there. 02:24 The president doesn't like the fact that people are politicizing agencies and departments that are specifically meant to not be political and not meant to be monetized off of security plans. 02:37 Stephen Colbert Monetized? 02:39 I'm sorry, I didn't realize that Brennan was doing beer ads now. 02:44 YES, YOU'LL NOTICE THAT WAS A SCHLITZ AD. 02:48 VERY RARE. 02:49 YOU DO NOT SEE SCHLITZ ADS MUCH ANYMORE. 02:51 IT IS THE ONLY BEER THAT WE COULD MAKE FUN OF. 02:56 SO WHERE DID TRUMP GET THE IDEA THESE FORMER INTELLIGENCE OFFICIALS WERE MONETIZING THEIR SECURITY CLEARANCES? 03:02 FROM KENTUCKY SENATOR AND MAN WHO ASKED HIS BARBER TO MAKE HIM LOOK LIKE A FOAMING MUG OF RUDE BEER, RAND PAUL. 03:12 who tweeted this yesterday. 03:13 Is John Brennan monetizing his security clearance? 03:17 Is John Brennan making millions of dollars divulging secrets to the mainstream media with his attacks on at real Donald Trump? 03:24 You know, Senator, just asking questions you don't know the answer to is not the same as proving the case. 03:30 Is Rand Paul the illegitimate son of Ayn Rand and a used Q-tip? 03:34 Is... 03:35 RAND PAUL SECRETLY MAKING MONEY ON THE SIDE AS THE PORN STAR RANDY POLES IN THE MOVIE RAND JOB. 03:45 WE DON'T KNOW. 03:46 WE DON'T KNOW. 03:47 AT THIS POINT, WE DON'T KNOW. 03:50 STILL, IT'S FOOD FOR THOUGHT. 03:54 BUT IN AN INTERVIEW, SENATOR PAUL DIDN'T SOUND THAT CONCERNED ABOUT THE MONEY BRENAN MAY OR MAY NOT BE MAKING. 03:59 Rand Paul I don't think we should reveal secrets to people who are calling the commander-in-chief treasonous. 04:04 I think... 04:04 I don't think there's many people in America who are gonna disagree with that judgment, that we would continue to give secrets to a person calling the president treasonous. 04:11 Stephen Colbert So, the only people who should have security clearance are people who always agree with the president? 04:17 Well, then, please welcome new CIA director Don and Eric stacked on top of each other... ...in a trench coat. 04:26 He can spy. 04:29 What's that? 04:31 Of course, some people are not worried at all, like Speaker of the House and man who just said, I won't betray our democracy, Paul Ryan. 04:40 Here's how Ryan responded when asked whether Trump is setting a dangerous precedent. 04:45 Paul Ryan I think he's trolling people, honestly. 04:46 I think he's just trolling people. 04:48 Stephen Colbert Yeah. 04:51 President of the United States is trolling people. 04:55 Nothing to worry about. 04:57 Just like when FDR addressed his worried nation. 04:59 The only thing we have to fear is that you're a bunch of wussy beta males. 05:06 You just got home, snowflakes.